It sucks to not be with her
It sucks not knowing where she is
It sucks to know that i could do more but not much.
It sucks to rush into things.
It sucks to not know what she is up to.
But most of all. It sucks to miss her and long for her to be with me.
But!
It’s amazing to be with her.
It’s amazing to look into her eyes and enjoy the silence
It’s amazing to hear her voice.
It’s amazing to feel the warmth when i hug her.
It’s amazing to have the feeling of endless striving to be the best.
and most of all. Every moment that i spend with her, is the best moment that i could possibly think of.
So what am i going to do u might ask so. I am going to do the impossible, I’m not rushing. Everything up until now feels right, i do not desperately need someone, but imagine a runner near the finish line, they ain’t gonna stop, they’re going to reach for it. and so that’s what im gonna do. I’m not gonna let a moment pass away. We do not know the future, and so i’m going to create my own road. And i hope that this is not the one with an end. It’s unnatural.
Am i in love? Perhaps.
Am i desperate? Fuck no.
Do i need her? Yes. Proven.
Do i want her to be with me? Want is obsessive, but it would be better if she is with me.
Am i a rational man? If I’m not, i wouldn’t let her to hang out with friends, club, and do stuff. As long as it is safe.
Do i trust her? I do.
Do i want to learn to be the best for her? Yes i do.
Do i want to give up when there’s a shit storm? No. I’m a man of my own words.
Would i give her the happiness she needs? Yes, i believe i could do that.
Would i fill her loneliness? Yes, i believe i could do that to.
Can i fulfill my promises? I have never broke my promise, even with my past. And certainly i’m not willing to start breaking anything.
Have i made up my mind? yes.
I am definetely going to go for it.
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